Shannon and Erik sneak out to go to a rave. Yeah, that’s going to go over really well with Matt.
I was the idiot that left the damn poster sitting on my bed. I knew that Matt would come in to get all the dirty clothes that piled up on the floor.
I was at Lisa’s when he found it… We were just hanging out like normal. Actually, we were talking about going to the rave — you know, the poster I had? Yeah, it was a poster to the rave. I had things planned out already. It started at eleven, but people didn’t start actually getting there til later. So I figured after Matt was sound asleep, I could sneak out and go to it. I’d heard it was going to be a kickass party and ALL of my friends were going to be there — including Erik, who was getting sexier by the moment. I know, I know, falling for one of your friends is a BAD idea, but I can’t help it! I was only a teenager… with raging hormones… what do you expect??
The second I got home Matt was standing there with the poster. “You’re not going,” he demanded, before even knowing if I was going.
I tried to play dumb. That always works. “Going where?”
He gave me that look. “You know exactly where, Shannon Kate,” he said, pointing to the poster.
“Ohhh, that thing? I’m not going… I just took it because… I thought it was pretty.” Hey, it was pretty! And that was the only thing I could think of.
I don’t think he bought it. In fact, I’m pretty sure he didn’t. “Pretty or not, no sister of mine is going to a rave, got it?”
“Yes, sir!” I said and saluted him. “What’s the fun in raves anyway? Just a bunch of people fucked up on X jumping around like idiots.”
He glared at me. “Language, Shannon,” he warned.
“Oops! Sorry..” I said, then snatched the poster back. “And it IS pretty! Even you have to admit it!”
He rolled his eyes. “Whatever,” he said, muttering something under his breath that sounded like “girls.”
Phew… got out of that one without getting into any trouble. Is that a first for me or what? If only things always worked out that easily.
So Friday night came around and I basically hung out with Lisa, Erik, and Jen all night. Surprisingly, Jen and Lisa weren’t going. Well, not so surprising. We kinda didn’t want them to go since it was a rave, and not really the thing for middle schoolers. I wasn’t really that sure what to expect, though… um, I’d never been to a rave before. Neither had Erik.
I ended up back at home at 10:43. Seventeen minutes before the rave started. I figured I’d see a relieved look on Matt’s face, but truthfully, I think he’d almost forgotten about it. That was lucky for me!!
Erik and I were supposed to meet outside about 12:30, so as to make sure that everyone was completely asleep when we met. We’re good at devising plans. If someone wasn’t asleep, we’d just call the other person and tell them in code… we just didn’t figure out a code.
Luckily, everyone was asleep by 12:30 and I made it safely out of my window to Erik’s car. “Everything smooth?” he asked, flipping a cigarette away and unlocking the doors. Gah, the way he was leaning against the car made him look sooo sexy.
“Everything’s fine. Matt’s asleep, and for all he knows, I’m asleep, too.”
We both looked sexy in our raver outfits. I was wearing super baggy jeans and a tight T-shirt that showed off my belly button ring. My hair was twirled up in little balls, though it’s kind of hard to explain. I was wearing dark eye makeup and silver lipstick, my face sprinkled with glitter. Erik was looking Orgy-ish, if you know the band I’m talking about. He was wearing a blue shirt and black pants, with some blue fingernail polish and makeup (guys with makeup are sexy, thank-you-very-much). His hair was spiked a little.. I could’ve raped him then and there… but I didn’t. Aren’t you proud of me?
He had a cute car, too.. perfect for jamming to techno as we prepared for the rave that was ahead. I was a little uneasy because this was something daring and new — something I hadn’t done before. And, um, I knew if I got caught then sitting during class for a couple of days wouldn’t be easy. I think that’s the adventure I got out of it… knowing that I couldn’t get caught.
“Couldn’t” is a strong word that’s often misused… especially by a teenager when referring to getting caught.
Anyway, we made it there safe and paid our entry fee and put on some glowy thingies which were really cool! and the loud techno music hit my ears. Ohhh wow, it was amazing. There was like, an automatic rush when you entered… everyone was dancing, crowded around the speakers. There were strobe lights and black lights and tons of glow sticks and necklaces and bracelets. I mean EVERYONE was dancing (okay, everyone on the dance floor was), and everyone was happy, and just.. wow. You see stuff like this on tv, but it’s nothing like real life.
I think everyone was on ecstasy, too.. If the kids weren’t dancing they were hanging out in the other parts of the warehouse. Some people were sitting on the stairs just talking to each other. Everyone kept hugging… So many people came up to us and started talking like we’d been friends forever. They were all so nice… and welcoming… a spiffy environment. Really… it was.
Erik and I decided against the X… duh. I wasn’t about to go home doped up on a drug, even though it was tempting. I knew that A) Matt would kill me, and B) if a cop happened to pull us over, I’d end up in jail for being on drugs, and C) what if it really wasn’t what they said it was and it fucked me up bigtime? I didn’t want ANY of those things to happen. But we danced anyway, jumping up and down, waving our arms around like idiots.
“This is so awesome!” I yelled to Erik over the music.
He smiled. “Shit yeah!”
It didn’t seem like long, but we must have danced for about an hour straight before deciding to take a break. I wanted some water, but I’d heard plenty of horror stories about water at places like that. Erik got us a bottle of water, though, and since it was sealed shut, I went ahead and drank it.
After we rested, I went back on the dance floor, but Erik decided to sit out for a little while. At first I was a little uncomfortable going out there alone, but after a while, with all of the inviting people, I just kinda got used to it, and didn’t even realize I was alone. Then I felt a heavy hand on my shoulder. I thought it was Erik — I was wrong. I looked straight up into Matt’s face.
Uhm, needless to say, the dancing stopped about right there and all I could think was SHIT!
“Uh, hey, Matt,” I stuttered.
“I’d like to know what the hell you’re doing,” he said.
He wasn’t expecting such a smartass answer and I knew right then that he want to haul off and smack me. But he didn’t, thank God.
He did, however, grab me by the upper arm and begin hauling me out of there.
“Hey! What the hell are you doing!”
“Taking you HOME,” he said.
I struggled to get free from his grip. “No! I’m staying here!” I commanded.
He stopped and turned around. “Shannon Kate Johnson, I am not in the mood for this attitude. You will get into the car without a fight or I will spank you right here and right now, Young Lady.”
He wouldn’t… would he? I decided not to chance it… I’d at least wait until we got in the car to talk about how I felt.
So that’s exactly what I did. I folded my arms and pouted and followed him out to the car. I started to worry about Erik. I could just call his cell later and let him know that I was okay and at home. Um, at least those were my intentions… even though I knew that I’d be so sore and exhausted after Matt got through with me that I probably wouldn’t be able to talk.
We finally arrived to the car and I decided to start my rant. “This isn’t fair!” I shouted. “I was just having a good time and you had to fucking drag me out of there and it isn’t fair!!”
Um, did I mention we weren’t even in the car yet? And wow… you thought he was infuriated before, you should have seen him then!
“It’s not fair to YOU?!?” he shouted. I’d never seen Matt lose it before and… honestly, I didn’t want to see him lose it then… but I couldn’t help it!
“No, it’s not fair for me! I’m not twelve fucking years old! You should treat me like an adult!!”
“Well you’re not a fucking adult either,” he said, pointing at me, not bothering to open the door. Thankfully there was a car inbetween us because he was on the drivers side and I the passengers, so he couldn’t hit me. “And you’re sure as hell not acting like one! What is this? Sneaking out of the house? Lying? Going to an illegal party where there’s tons of drugs? What else did you do, Shannon, huh? Are you on speed? X? LSD?”
I glared. “No, I’m not that stupid.”
“Yeah, well it was pretty stupid just being in that place because you and I both know that there are TONS of drugs in there and if the police decided to check it out, you’d be up a shit-creek just for being AROUND the drugs. Is that an adult thing to do? You’re saying I should treat you like an adult?”
“YES!” I yelled.
He sighed heavily, unlocked the doors, and plopped onto the seat. He held his head in his hands, trying to calm himself. He was so angry that he was shaking. Maybe trying to fight this wasn’t such a good idea…
“Look,” I said, trying to speak calmly and rationally, “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry? You worried me half-to-death and all you have to say is ‘sorry’? I’m going to tell you one thing, Shannon Kate, you might get away with this at home, but you’re not getting away with it with me. I’m sick of the bullshit you keep pulling. All the lying, the attitude, the disobedience, is going to stop, do you understand? I’m not going to put up with this. If I have to spank you everyday to keep you in line, if I have to look over your shoulder every minute of the day, I’m going to. Got it?”
“There you go, treating me like a fucking kid again,” I muttered.
This time there wasn’t a car inbetween us… and I totally wasn’t expecting it, but he slapped me across the face, and hard. “You won’t use that type of language either, Shannon,” he said, then started up the car.
At that time, I was too shocked and hurt to really say anything. Tears were burning my eyes. I couldn’t believe that he’d slapped me… I couldn’t believe this was all happening like it was… I wanted to wake up from this dream… This couldn’t be happening…
I pulled out my cellphone to send a text message to Erik. Clearly, I wouldn’t be calling him anytime tonight.
Erik — Matt found me. sry. talk 2morrow.
I took a deep breath and leaned my head back, closing my eyes, the tears wanting to stream down. I had on so much makeup, though… I couldn’t ruin it. I never wore makeup.
I survived the long, silent ride home. I’d have liked it better if I could have at least listened to some music, but I guess I had to be content that I was still alive?
“Go to bed. We’ll discuss this in the morning.”
Totally wasn’t expecting that. That meant I had to deal with all the nervous anxiety that I had… and he expected me to sleep???
As you could probably have guessed, I didn’t sleep much. I was up all night basically crying. Matt was always the easygoing type, didn’t lose his temper, was always smiling and laughing… and geeze, I’d really screwed it up this time. I’d screwed it up enough to where he’d actually come out to the rave and yell at me… a lot! And he also wasn’t the type that used much profanity… and I’d also seen that side of him! Great job, Shannon.
I ended up text messaging Erik back and forth all night, telling him kind of what happened. Embarrassing as it was, he knew that Matt spanked me. It was kinda something that all of us got at one point or another, so though I didn’t exactly want him to know, it wasn’t as big of a deal as it would be if spankings were unheard of.
I finally managed to sleep a little. When I woke up, Erik had sent me three text messages. Well, it was fun while it lasted. and Shannon? are you still there? and finally, at like 5am he sent I had a good time but itd have been better with u. Those were great ways to start my morning. I actually ended up smiling.
That didn’t last long. I pushed myself up from the bed, still in the raver clothes I’d worn the night before, my hear all messed up, my makeup all smeared. The first thing I wanted to do was get a shower, not a spanking. I hoped Matt would make that possible.
He was lying on the futon when I emerged from his room. He looked like he hadn’t slept at all. That made me feel worse. “Hey,” I mumbled.
“It’s okay if I take a shower before we talk?”
He nodded again.
I took a towel and some fresh pjs (I figured I wouldn’t be much in the mood to do anything the rest of the day) and made sure it was a really hot shower. I washed my hair and tried not to think about my impending punishment. So much for that.
When I got out and dressed, I dried my hair with the towel, then went back into the living room. Matt was in the very same spot, still looking exhausted. I figured he wouldn’t be much in the mood for my attitude… and I was probably obligated to speak first.
I cleared my throat. “I’m sorry,” I began. “I shouldn’t have gone to the rave, I shouldn’t have lied to you. I’m sorry.”
He looked at me. “I’m glad you’re finally seeing the seriousness of what you did.” He stood up and walked over to me. “I don’t think you realize, though, why I didn’t want you to go there. It’s completely and totally illegal, it’s dangerous, you could get into all sorts of trouble. I know you know that, Shannon. You’re not a child anymore.”
“And I don’t appreciate the language you’re using with me, so from now on, anytime I hear any type of obscene language from you, I’m washing your mouth out with soap, end of story. Understand?”
I nodded again.
“So we’re going to start that now. Come with me.”
“Wait… Matt… do we hafta???”
“YES we have to, and don’t even think about resisting because you’re going to make it harder on yourself.”
I gulped and followed him to the bathroom where he repeated the same procedure as always. He got out the bar of soap and a washcloth and wet them both, then scrubbed the soap with the washcloth, getting it all bubbly. My stomach churned. I hated this part as much as the spanking itself.
“Open,” he ordered.
I closed my eyes and opened my mouth like I was at the dentist — I knew it was going to hurt, but maybe if I closed my eyes it wouldn’t feel so bad. I felt him take ahold of my chin and then he thrusted the washcloth in my mouth, scrubbing the insides. He scrubbed the roof of my mouth, the cheeks, and finally my tongue. I started gagging and then crying, wanting to plead with him to stop. It tasted so gross and it was so embarrassing and I hated this so much. But he just kept scrubbing and when he finally stopped, he put the soap in my mouth.
“Leave it there,” he said, then sat down on the edge of the bathtub, taking me over his lap. I squirmed, wanting to spit out the soap and not wanting to get spanked. I cried harder.
My pjs were thin… great idea at putting them on instead of pants. He didn’t take them down, but I could still feel his palm, clear as daylight. He spanked me and spanked and spanked until I was kicking and crying and couldn’t really breathe because I was keeping the soap in my mouth. “This is for having a dirty mouth, Shannon Kate. You’re going to have to learn to control that.”
I nodded, wanting to promise that I’d stop talking badly around him.
He lifted me up and took the bar of soap from my mouth then gave me a tiny cup of water to rinse out with. My bottom stung like crazy and I wanted to rub, and I wanted this to be over, but it wasn’t… I wasn’t even close to being finished.
I spit the water out, trying to make sure I got the nasty soap taste out of my mouth (I didn’t), then allowed myself to be dragged to the living room. “I’m not going to put up with any of this backtalk, the language, the lying, the blatant disobedience… do you hear me? No sister of mine is going to act like this.”
I nodded, sniffling and letting the tears stream down my face.
“If I have to ground you and watch your every move to make sure that you don’t sneak out of the house again to go to some kind of rave, I will. Do you understand?”
“Yes, sir,” I said, feeling that it was the necessary thing to say at that time.
With that he threw me over his lap, tugging my pj pants and panties down, and then began spanking me rapidly with the damn hairbrush! I hadn’t even noticed that he’d been holding it, I was too busy thinking about the fact that this wasn’t over and I was freaking out about the punishment… how had I been so stupid as to not realize he was holding the hairbrush!!
In no time I was screaming, kicking, squirming, and throwing a fit! Oh my gosh that thing hurt like hell. “Ooooowwwwwww… pleaseeeeeeeee Matt!!!!! I’m-m sssorry!!!!! Pleaseee no moreee!!” I pleaded, kicking and trying not to block.
He held me firmer, keeping my squirming to a minimum, until it hurt so badly that I was squirming and kicking full-out again, and then he stopped, placing me over one knee, and using the other leg to keep me from kicking.
“Pleaseee,” I wailed, crying more than ever, unable to contain myself.
“Shannon Kate, are you going to do as I say?”
“Are you going to lie to me?” he asked, emphasizing his words with a hearty smack of the hairbrush. “Are you going to cock an attitude? Are you going to use profanity??”
“Nooooooooo!!” I cried. I was trying to promise him that I’d do what I was supposed to, that I would NEVER go to a rave again, and all that good stuff. He kept spanking, though, and through the spanking I couldn’t find much room to talk (it was because I was crying too hard!)
He kept his hand on my back, holding me down as he spanked harder, spanked my sitspots, and move on to my thighs. He kept going for what felt like hours, until after I was out of energy, after I was bawling like a baby, and after my thighs felt like they’d be bruised for weeks. My arse was on fire. I was drained.
He lifted me up, keeping my hands away from my face to dry my tears, and made me look at him in the eyes. “I love you, Shannon. I love you so much. What you did last night was very dangerous. Anything can happen at raves… stuff that you don’t want to happen. I’m sure it was fun, but it’s also illegal. I don’t mind if you go to a party every now and then, but make sure that it’s okay with me and that you aren’t doing anything you’re not supposed to, got it?”
“While Mom and Dad are out of town, you’re my responsibility, and that means that you’re going to do what I say. I understand you’re a ‘teenager’ and it’s in your nature to rebel every once in a while. But get rid of the attitude at everything I say. I’m not much older than you, Shannon. I can remember being in high school like it was yesterday. I know what goes on in school, I know what goes on at parties, and I know the types of stuff you’re likely to do. I’m not stupid and not as old as Mom and Dad. There’s stuff that you could get away with them and you won’t be able to get away with it with me. It’s not because I’m mean or cruel or just a total asshole, but it’s because I know how things work, I know how dangerous they are, and while it’s okay to experiment with certain things, other things are not okay to experiment with. No sis of mine is going to jail, okay?”
I nodded again.
He gave me a quick hug and a pat on the bottom. He let go of my wrists to allow me to wipe my eyes. “Go stand in the corner while I fix lunch, and then you can eat, change clothes, and do whatever. Consider yourself lucky that you’re not grounded, Shannon.”
I wiped my eyes and gave a final nod, letting him know that I knew I was lucky, since I still wasn’t able to speak from crying so much. I hobbled to the corner, planted my nose in it, and waited there with a throbbing bottom while he fixed us something to eat. Then I sat down on that damn hard chair, squirming all the time I was eating. I wasn’t angry with Matt — how could I be mad at my own brother? I did take what he said to heart. He wasn’t stupid, no doubt about that. He was only a few years older than me. He’d gone to parties all the time… Had something happened with him that I didn’t know about? What kinds of stuff had he seen? Under what circumstances would I be allowed to go to parties?
Just then I heard my message alert on my cell. I’d gotten a text message. That reminded me of Erik. “So, you said I’m not grounded?” I said, raising my eyebrows.
He smiled. “Nah, I have to work tonight. I couldn’t keep much of an eye on ya.”
I smiled back. “So I can hang out with Lisa or Erik?”
“Yeah, just no parties.”
“Don’t worry,” I answered, finishing my meal then giving my older brother a hug.
Skipping back to my room to change clothes, I checked the message on my phone.
hey, everything ok? if it is, wana see a movie tonight? just me and u?
A grin was plastered on my face (I nearly ran into the wall staring at that message!). Erik was asking me… on a date!!!
I allowed the excitement to fill my body as I responded that I’d love to attend a movie (of course, trying to make it sound as much like friends as possible, in case he had different ideas about things than I did), and then I took another shower (what? my hair was frizzy because I didn’t dry it). The day didn’t turn out to be as bad as I thought it’d be.